NEXT TRIP ON MY AGENDA - FINLAND!

Most of you know me well enough to know that I LOVE to travel.  My next adventure will be this summer when I head to Helsinki, Finland.  We had an exchange student my junior year of highschool and she has remained part of our family ever since.  My parents and my daughter have been there but for some reason I haven't.  It's time!  We also had an exchange student from Holland and I've been there so many times that it feels like going home when I get there.  I think having my trip to Finland in front of me will help to keep me motivated.  I would love to take a trip and actually be in some of the photos.  So I'll continue to get to the gym and on my elliptical and as soon as the weather starts to warm up I'll attempt to start jogging again knowing it's what is best for my health but really imagining me in the beautiful country of Finland  in a photo smiling, happy and not hiding behind anyone or anything. 

AT THE SPEED OF LIFE...

Do you ever take a moment to think about how fast life is passing us by?  When I look at my kids it really hits me - my baby is 12 and my oldest 28 - when did that happen?  My goal has been to appreciate every day - crazy hectic and filled to the brim with busyness - but appreciated.  I'm a big fan of taking opportunities whenever presented to me - from traveling, joining a friend for lunch, going out for a girls night, snuggling with my girls when they crawl in bed, putting the grandkids on the counter while I stir up my cookie batter and giving them a spoon full when it's all mixed, and laughing whenever possible and yet there is so much more I wish I took the time to do but the clock keeps ticking and the day comes to an end.  So fitting in exercise has been a long time excuse I have used over and over again - "I don't have time!".  But since  I have committed to exercising for about 3 or 4 weeks now I'm amazed how making it a priority has made it part of my day - like showering, gettting to work and doing my everyday "stuff".   I have finally faced the fact that baking is not a form of exercise.  I'm sad about that but it was time to accept it and move onto the elliptical that has been sitting in the family room gathering dust and I'm amazed how 45 minutes really doesn't seem like the eternity it did a few weeks ago. 
So I keep moving so I will be able to keep up with the speed of my life that will otherwise pass me by.

BEACH GETAWAYS WITH GIRLFRIENDS - Good for the soul!

Had a 24 hour getaway to the beach with 2 of my girlfriends and it was just what the Dr. ordered.  We have all committed to a healthier lifestyle so it was good to be able to talk about what works and what doesn't work for each of us.  We walked on the beach, drank some wine and listened to a great band and stayed in a good friends beach house steps from the ocean - it was a great 24 hours.  There is something about hearing the waves crash on the beach that makes my world a better place.  Had 2.5 slices of pizza but watched what I ate the rest of the day and got on the elliptical for 45 minutes tonight.  My pants are starting to loosen up and I'm getting into the swing of reaching for food that's good for me with a splurge now and then of peanut M&Ms and pizza and still staying on track.  I'm tracking my food on Spark People on line (it's free) and I think that is really helping me.  I have a "dress up" fundraising event the end of this month and I'm hoping I can find a dress (I wear one of those about once every 12 years or so) that I feel good in so we'll see if that happens.  I'll keep you posted. 

PEANUT M&M'S HOW I LOVE YOU...!!!

Today was a day that in my mind I convinced myself that peanut M&M's are a healthy snack - they do have peanuts in them!!  Then I took it one step further and decided they would count as one of my meals today.  Funny how when I was eating them that all made sense to me.  Had a healthy breakfast and lunch and then had a little M&M set back around 5:00 when I had to walk into my partner's office - now you have to understand that my partner's office is completly filled with M&M figurines and LARGE bags of plain & peanut M&M's that are always open waiting to be eaten - it's a sugar lovers dream and a dieters nightmare.  Luckily no ones fingers were near me when I dove in or it could have gotten ugly.  What in the world is that all about?  Every one of those sweet little morsels made me think that I shouldn't be eating them but did I stop - NOPE!  I even tried to picture them in their little commercials where they are living, breathing little nuggets that talk and I still kept biting into their little bodies...I'm sick, really sick!  So what do they call this - a set back, a lack of willpower, a reason to give up... I'm not sure but whatever it is I will go home and get on the elliptical and feel guilty for the rest of the evening and then wake up tomorrow ready to get back on track and put my M&M nightmare in the past.  Heading to the beach with girlfriends tomorrow - lots of walking and lettuce will be involved and wine of course and we will get renewed, rejuvenated and ready to continue on our journey to better health occasionally scattered with some peanut M&M's,

EXERCISING ALONE - WHY OH WHY IS IT SOOO HARD???

Happy Hump Day!  I get up this morning, get the girls to school and head to the gym.  Wait in the parking lot for my exercise buddy and she doesn't show up - I check my phone - a text at 6:59a.m. - "Passing on the gym this morning."  Luckily I didn't read it before I pulled into the parking lot or I would have headed home.  I sat there for a minute and then realized how ridiculous it was that I was actually considering leaving instead of going in to workout by myself.  So I headed in and slid on the stationary bike w/my 2 magazines and start pedaling away.  I did 45 minutes - 10.2 miles and actually was sweating and for those of you that know me - # 1-  I rarely sweat and # 2 - I HATE to sweat.  It was good to be on something else other then the elliptical or walking and it was a decent workout - for someone that isn't in shape.  My niece showed me a site she's on that looks really good - it's www.sparkpeople.com  Lots of good ideas and support and a place to track your food intake and exercise and best of all it's FREE - Check it out!!  Off to lunch - a big salad with grilled chicken - I haven't had one of those all week.  Have a wonderful day and keep moving!

31 WAYS TO MOTIVATE YOURSELF TO EXERCISE

I found a great link with ideas to stay motivated to exercise so I thought I would share it.  31 Ways to Motivate Yourself to Exercise  I'm going to pass on including a quote for now and will post them as I come across ones I really like.  Got myself on the elliptical last night for 45 min. and walked on the track at the gym for an hour this morning.  I have cheated, every day I guess, by having one sweet thing - yesterday a few Swedish fish, today a carmel from Wertz Candy.  The big difference is that I'm having one sweet thing - not eating sweets morning, noon & night.  I'm not sure if I really should get sugar out of my life completely but I do know when I think about doing that I get a lump in my throat and my eyes well up with tears.  I have a very strong emotional attachment to sugar.  I almost feel as though it would be another divorce (and really, I know what those feel like - yes, I said "those" as in plural).  For now I will continue on my goal to get up and move at least 5-6 days a week and put the banning of sugar completely from my life on the back burner - I have 2 more teenage girls to raise - either let me have my sugar or my good friend Mr. Vodka will be back on the menu!!!  So click on the link and go get motivated to move!!!

QUOTE #11 - WHO DECIDES WHAT'S IMPOSSIBLE?

We would accomplish many more things if we did not think of them as impossible. Vince Lombardi  I thought today would be a good day to use a Vince Lombardi quote.  My mom loved Vince Lombardi, his drive, his determination to win - if she had been a guy, she would have wanted to be Vince Lombardi!  So many times we are the ones that limit what we do because we think we can't.  My goal is to tell myself everyday " I can!" from dieting to becoming who I was put here to be.  Took a couple days off from my blog for a number of reasons - Friday I was a mess due to personal issues my daughter is having in Middle School.  Did I mention I really dislike Middle School girls...!!!  Saturday headed to NYC - miserable weather but still had a great day in the city!  Sunday, cleaned and baked for the Super Bowl gathering - I LOVE to entertain.  That's when I miss my big house - it was the perfect house for entertaining.  I didn't do too bad this weekend with my eating and weekends are normally a struggle. I'm able to button a few pair of pants without passing out from not breathing so I think that's a good sign.  Back at the gym this am and it felt good.  I'm battling what seemed to be allergies but I think it's turning into a cold - UGH! Would love some healthy recipes - if you have any you love please share!  It's Monday - Go accomplish the impossible!!

QUOTE # 10 - ARE YOU A WHY OR WHY NOT KIND OF PERSON?

“You see things; and you say, 'Why?' But I dream things that never were; and I say, 'Why not?'”  George Bernard Shaw  I always liked this quote.  I think people are either the "Why's" or the "Why Not's".  I'm definately the "Why Not's".  So I want to figure out how to turn that swirling around in my head into the drive I need to make some life long changes to becoming healthy.  How do I turn what I know I need to do into an "idea" that I need to bring to fruition?  Someone made a comment that it's not the gym I need - it's making up my mind to do this, and then doing it.  It really is a head game isn't it?!  Was at the gym this morning and did a good pace on the track for an hour with my walking buddy - it felt good.  I did the elliptical yesterday morning and then hiked with my daughter through the snow for 45 min to an hour.  I'm eating better - no more sweets and I'm actually eating fruit everyday.  I guess the question is I know I'm on the right track - can I stay on it?  And then I have to ask myself - "WHY NOT?!!" 

QUOTE # 9 - HABITS - GOOD & BAD

"Habit is habit and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time." Mark Twain Why are bad habits so hard to get rid of and good habits so hard to keep?  I would love to figure that one out.  Did not go to the gym yesterday - instead shoveled all the ice for about an hour - a good work out!  My gym partner went into work early today due to the weather so I am opting for my elliptical this morning and then back to shovel ice again today.  I'm OK with not doing the gym everyday as long as the days I don't go I'm doing some kind of exercise.  The gym is my back up for boredom and also my time to exercise around other people - As most of you know, I'm not a loner - I need to be around people.  Ended up with a major headache from going cold turkey off my Diet Ice Tea (which I am absolutely sure is what makes me crave sugar).  I know the headache will come but I also know it only lasts a day so yesterday was the day - today back to normal & no more sugar cravings - as I tell myself everyday - baby steps!

QUOTE #8 - LISTEN, I HAVE AN IDEA...

"To develop an idea you must listen to what is going on in your head."  Oh my, this is a confusing quote for me because there is ALWAYS something going on in my head.  What do I want to be when I grow up; do I call today to make that appt. with the school principal or do I cool off for a day or two; what can I do to make my fundraisers for the parade an even bigger success; what more can I do for my dear friends at Ballou; what can I do to stay motivated to a healthier lifestyle - and the list goes on.  A wonderful friend of mine always had ideas running through his head, amazing ideas, and he made me believe that ideas are dreams and dreams can become a reality or a nightmare.  Life is like that for people that have ideas.  They are there and they circle and circle in your head until you either give up or you take that leap to act upon them.  If you take the leap you will be a success even if you fail as long as you get back up - and as my mom told me one time when my world had completely blown up in my face "Pick yourself up by your bootstraps, move on and forgive because without forgiveness (to yourself or to others) you will carry that with you and it will make you a bitter person."  What???? - Pick myself up - I'm having a breakdown, I'm a mess, I can't do that and how dare you ask me to do that at this moment (you have to know my mom), but I did it and guess what - I moved forward and I forgave.  The best advice I ever got -Thanks Mom!  So I have ideas, lots and lots of ideas and some of them I will act on and others will get lost and go away.  I guess the question is for the ones that stay - where will they lead me?  My only hope is that in the end my ideas will have made me a better person and will have made someone elses life just a tiny bit better in some way.   My idea for this week is that I need to change my way of thinking about my physical self - through exercise and eating healthy & I'm ready to get that idea out of my head and act on it - I joined the gym this morning and started - Day one of a great idea!!!

QUOTE #7 - YOU HAVE TO BEGIN

"If you don't dare to begin, you don't stand a chance of getting there."  I thought this seemed to be an appropriate quote since I'm beginning my gym membership Monday morning.  It will be my beginning - again!  I have had this beginning a number of times and usually with some success but then for some reason the motivation wanes and my commitment becomes what's convenient and then I'm back to doing nothing.  What keeps some people continuosly driven?  I had a good 10 year run of being thin - or as thin as a person like me gets - and I was probably the most unhealthy I've ever been.  I literally starved myself and exercised too much.  I ate a pack of crackers a day or a half bagel and picked at things in very small portions.  I remember being in Europe (wearing size 5's) and not wanting to go to the beach because I felt fat.  What is that???!!!  Looking back I can't believe that during those "thin" years there was never one day that I didn't wake up and think - just 10 more pounds and I would be happy.  Now I look at myself and wonder what happened - when did the obsessiveness turn into - I don't care anymore?  So my attempt this time is to find a happy, healthy medium.  I MUST incorporate moving & making healthy eating choices into a daily part of my life not for 4 weeks or a few months but for a lifetime.  Can I do it??  I believe I can do anything I set my mind to so guess what Becky - it's TIME TO BEGIN!

QUOTE # 6 - TIME TO TURN OUT THE LIGHTS

"When you stop giving, when you stop offering something to someone, it's time to turn out the light." George Burns Got rid of all my dark chocolate mint cake balls today & they seemed to be a hit. Next batch - strawberry cake w/cream cheese icing dipped in chocolate. Stay tuned. Trying to figure out how I can make money baking - a website, a stand at the Farmers Market, selling to restaurants, having my own wine & chocolate cafe???? Who knows what the future holds. Shoveled for almost an hour this a.m. & it felt good. Saw a good friend tonight that always makes me smile & then listened to a great piano player & singer w/a glass of wine & a salad & laughed some more w/another good friend. My life is good beyond words. I used to have the big house, the stuff, the money to do the things I wanted to do. I have had to scale back for a number of personal reasons & I've never been happier. OK I know i've said this before but will be starting my morning gym workouts on Monday! You can hold me to that along w/an intence 4 week commitment to starving, I mean eating lots of green leafy stuff & not much else. I'm going to get this almost 50 (I'm 48) body's metabolism jump started. Please remember that I mentioned in my first blog that I have know idea about how to do all this but that's why I asked you to join me - so you can send me down the right path to a healthier me. Time to say good night to the piano man and turn off the lights! Thanks for checking in.

QUOTE #5 - GET RID OF THE NEGATIVE

"Get rid of the negative people in your life - surround yourself with positive people who believe in you and inspire you" This is something I try to live by. I have girlfriends that have been through a lot but when we are together we don't dwell on the negative we enjoy the time we have together & laugh enough to hold us over until we can squeeze some time in together again. In our hectic lives we barely have time to do the things we have to do so adding something else to our lives (like exercising) especially something to do daily, can seem overwhelming. I have come to the conclusion that it has to be as much a part of my routine as brushing my teeth. So I continue to hop on my elliptical (as boring as it is become) until I go sign up at the gym. I get to shovel snow in the morning so that will be a good workout. Sledding is on the agenda for the weekend so I'm looking forward to that. In the meantime I will jump on the elliptical tonight and think happy thoughts about my good friends that inspire me & make me laugh - you're the best!

QUOTE # 4 - GET OUT OF THE WAY

"Even if you are on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there." Will Rogers.
Sometimes, no most of the time I am my own worst enemy.  I decide I can't do it.  I decide what others think about me when I really don't know.  I convince myself that I'm not smart enough.  I am my own worst enemy more often then not.  I have a weak moment and use that as an excuse to stop doing what I know I need to do instead of looking at it as a minor set back that I'm not going to let send me back in the wrong direction.
So, back on track - the right track.  I got on the elliptical last night and did 3 loads of laundry (does that count as a workout?).  I did make these amazing red velvet choc. covered cake balls and only ate one.  I will get the remaineder out of my house by tonight.  Baking is my therapy.  It keeps me sane - I'm not sure why but it does.  It's a shame running or working out isn't my therapy for sanity -that would have made my life much easier - with alot less time wishing I could get motivated to work out. 
So, I am what I am - good, bad or otherwise and I have made up my mind to make the best of that.  My goal is to someday have a wine & chocolate bar for people to come and hang out with me and enjoy a nice glass of wine and a (little) piece of some wonderful chocolate concoction.  In the meantime I want to enjoy this moment, this day and make the most of all the blessings in my life and then doing what I need to do to try to be around a long time to enjoy them all.
Thanks for listening!

QUOTE # 3 - HAPPY MONDAY!

"Failure is only a fact when you give up. Everyone gets knocked down, the question is: Will you get back up?"
Looks like I slipped off the healthy eating boat a bit this weekend... I did OK on Saturday but no exercise and then Sunday - 2 pancakes, a DQ choc. cone dipped in choc. and then a chicken sub for dinner.  The chicken sub wasn't too bad because it had shaved chicken (no skin), lettuce, & tomato and I had it dry and it was a regular size but still a sub.  Had I stopped there - not so bad but then I threw in 6 wings (5 of which I ate).  WHY, oh why!!!  It's simple - don't order it or better yet - don't open your mouth.  What is this power food has over me?!
Tonight we are signing up for a family membership to the sports center - My goal is to be in the pool or on the track in the evening and then meeting Kathy in the morning.  If I'm struggling with the food part of all of this at least I need to get my body moving on a regular basis.  Anyone that would like to join us in the morning or join me in the evenings I would love to have company.  It's $36 a month or $46 a month for a couple. 
Knocked down but I will get back up!!! 

QUOTE #2

"You must do the thing that you think you cannot do" Eleanor Roosevelt It's the weekend. I'm hungry! Can my body be on a weekend break to eat the junk food I have stayed away from this week? Probably not!!!!! Got a new iPad today-I'm in love!! Does finger tapping on a screen count as exercise? If so I'm definitely on my way to a svelte, new me. Gotta go (look stuff up on my new toy). Talk to you later.

A QUOTE A DAY - I love quotes

Quote #1
Dare to soar - how successful you are is determined by your attitude.
I decided that I'll start off each day with a motivational quote.  I love quotes - I have them taped all over my desk and I actually read them often.  If you have a favorite quote please share it on here. 
A 2 hour delay today for the kids so I slept in a bit then up to make lunches and eat my breakfast (which I never used to do but everything I read says you must eat breakfast).  Realized I might not have time for my elliptical workout and noticed I started slowing down with the things I needed to get done before taking the kids to school and getting ready for work thinking that I wouldn't have time to do my 45 minutes so maybe I'll skip it this morning - WHAT ARE YOU DOING - get your butt on that elliptical.  So I did.  I only had time for 30 minutes but I decided to push myself and really work up a sweat if I was only doing 30 minutes.  I did it!  30 minutes, not 45 but I did it. 

A WORK IN PROGRESS... My blog and Me!

Today was a day to try to figure out the logistics of the computer and my blog and since computers are not my thing I had to ask some friends and they were good enough to help me out.  Thanks Tim and Marj! 
I'm going to get back on the elliptical tonight (I had pasta, chicken & broccoli for dinner).  I decided that if I'm home and I don't have anything to do - other then what I always have to do, laundry, picking up, dishes, etc., - then I will commit to getting on the elliptical for my 45 minutes at night too. 
It's kind of amazing that since I started this blog I think about everything I eat - before I eat it.  Prior to this I thought about everything I ate at the end of the day when I went to bed and hated myself for everything I had stuffed in my mouth all day.  I think I may be on the right track.  For all of you that have encouraged me and made suggestions and pushed me onward - thank you from the bottom of my soon to be healthy heart!!!

STAYING MOTIVATED - Help!!

I need friends - preferably non-skinny friends - that want to commit to exercising or calling or exchanging recipes and most of all that like laughing together more then any of the above.  With our busy lives it seems next to impossible to coordinate a time to work out a schedule with someone and yet I'm not good doing anything alone much less something that needs me to make so many personal changes in me!  So what do I do?  Where can I dig up some friends?  Where do I go to find someone that wants or needs the things that I do???   Any suggestions?

Where do I begin...

Good morning!  My first blog - ever!  Decided to rally the troops and attempt to create a support system by starting a blog about eating, exercising, gaining weight, losing weight, and the main thing - wanting to feel good about myself - my body - for once in my life.  I know nothing about the right way to do this but I do know that I'm tired and it's time.  So I leave this open for you to join me and together we will support one another and hopefully lead ourselves down the path to good health, good body image and a smaller jeans size (I'm a jeans and cowboy boots kind of girl).
Tell me what has worked for you.  Tell me what I need to do to make that lightbulb go off in my head and make me say no or walk away from the junk my body doesn't need (I love sugar!).  Tell me how to motivate myself to get up and exercise.
I'm ready - let's do this together!